THE CHARGE OF THE LIGHT (BRAINED) BRIGADE

2016-GOP-Candidates

With apologies to Alfred Lord Tennyson…though admittedly not vey sincere apologies.

Half a mile Half a mile
Half a mile onward
All in the Valley of Iowa
Rode the six Hundred
“Forward the candidates
Charge for the votes”
Into the valley of Iowa
Rode the six hundred

“Forward the candidates”
Was man or woman dismayed?
Not though the candidate knew
They all had blundered
Theirs not to reason why
Climate change to deny
Theirs but to lie and lie
Into the Valley of Iowa
Rode the six hundred.

Reporters to right of them
Reporters to left of them
Reporters in front of them
Volleyed and thundered
Stormed at with “why the hell
Can’t you treat the poor well
Condemning them to death
While you are rich as hell?”
Rode the six hundred.

Flashed all their white teeth bare
“Repeal Obamacare”
Claiming the world ain’t fair
All the world wondered
Why are you blowing smoke
Your platform is a joke
Doctor and Mogul
Sold us a pig in a poke
All rotted and rendered
Then they rode back but not
Not the six hundred

Now reporters to right of them
Polls to left of them
Voters in front of them
Volleyed and thundered
Stormed at with “what the hell!
We’re glad your egos fell”
Your ideas we quell
That came through the Valley of Iowa
Tell you go to hell
All that was left of them
Left of six hundred

When can their nionsense fade
O’ the wild charges they made
All the world wondered
Condemn the charge they made
Condemn this odd brigade
Ignoble six hundred.

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Comments

  • Little_Minx  On June 17, 2015 at 10:57 AM

    That graphic doesn’t even include GOP “deep thinker” The Donald, who announced yesterday and should be conspicuous by that strange animal he wears atop his head 😉 And I’m not sure which one is Lindsey Graham, either (although that fellow top left scarily resembles Richard Nixon).

    • Little_Minx  On June 17, 2015 at 11:00 AM

      And the woman looks more like SC Gov. Nikki Haley than announced candidate Carly Fiorina (whose principal “qualifications” are having failed as HP CEO, then losing her only run for elective office).

      At least the Iowa GOP has finally realized the foolishness of its Straw Poll and canceled it.

      • Devildog  On June 23, 2015 at 9:57 PM

        A successful, intelligent woman (with successes not dependent on her husband) and this is what we get from the Minx! Nice!

  • umoc193  On June 17, 2015 at 6:34 PM

    Sorry, had to work with the inages available, or at least the ones that weren’t just straight on head shots. The campaign is a caricature so I thopught the photo ought to be, too, just to convey the notion.

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