The immigration crisis, if not dominating recent news, certainly has been in the spotlight.  I believe the immigration crisis extends back about 400 or so years to when we actually had organized efforts to bring shiploads of immigrants from Africa. Never mind the minor detail that they were not about to storm the borders voluntarily.

Then we became a nation of our own. Before long as was manifest, we took huge steps to eliminate the original protesters of unwanted immigration to these shores. George Armstrong Custer became a victim of these protesters who were acting as a collection of nineteenth century Cliven Bundys. Well we showed them, didn’t we? We even wounded some of their knees in the process.

As our nation grew due to our own illegal immigration into Mexico and other lands, we had a need to tie all parts together. Then, as now, technology was part of the solution and we undertook a great enterprise of capitalism, unimpeded by the government, to link our coasts by railroad. Of course unimpeded by government here means that the government gave the railroads land grants totaling almost 10% of what land belonged in the public domain at the time (1850-1871).

Remarkably, building 2000 miles of railway necessitated the employment of thousands upon thousands of laborers since Carnegie-Mellon University failed miserably in providing robots to do the work. Real live people were needed and for the last push from the east by the Union Pacific Civil War veterans were utilized.

In Utah Brigham Young welcomed the opportunity for his Mormons to gain work. I hear tell that a very youthful Mitt Romney swung a mean pick. But alas, he paid no income tax on his earnings. PARASITE!

Moving eastward from California the labor problem was solved in large part by waves of Chinese immigrants.. They had the advantage of not only being reliable and energetic workers, they could also ensure clean clothing for the next day’s exertions.

But just like an ungrateful dog who bites his owner’s hand when given a biscuit, when the last spike was driven at Promontory Point, the Chinese were expendable. It seems they took SO many jobs away from real Americans…you know, the white ones…that there was a movement to keep more Chinese from entering the Land of The Selectively Free and The Home of The Brave Willing to Send Other People To Be Killed in The Wars They Started.

Thus the Chinese Exclusion Act Of 1882 was born, renewed for ten years each twice and Chinese Immigration was permanently banned in 1902. So what had become a Chinese majority population—and by majority I mean .002%—would have to grow the old fashioned way.

Not that discrimination against immigrants was confined to the yellow ones. Indeed folks from Ireland and Germany and Italy and elsewhere were not exactly given standing ovations upon arrival. But they were grudgingly welcomed not so much because they were the tired and poor and yearning to be free of Emma Lazurus’s vision but because they were willing to enter the mines and steel mills and sweatshops that our “natives” had determined were not fit for human consumption.

Contemporaneously a group of immigrants once welcomed were now encouraged to “go back where they came from” even though most of them could trace their lineage in the New World back farther than could most of the idiots objecting to them.

These Not No More Slaves were now free to exercise every privilege accorded white folk, except for maybe voting, living where they wanted, having decent paying jobs and housing and eating in the same restaurants and pissing and shitting in the same pots as their superiors.

Indeed Americans who loved to socialize, developed clubs promoting such outward migration. These clubs were called the Ku Klux Klan.

Okay, our history isn’t always pretty regarding aliens. Today there are fights in Congress, on our borders, and on Fox News about what to do with the folks darkening our borders.

The ever brilliant Bill O’Reilly has come up with a solution. THE WALL You see Bill was such a fan of the lately departed and obviously much lamented Communist Soviet Union that admiringly he believes we should follow in its footsteps of its occupation of Berlin and erect a wall on our Southern border.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/17/bill-oreilly-border-wall_n_5594879.html

In that video he correctly notes the Wall’s success as there were only about 5000 attempts to breach it in its 38 year existence. What is conveniently absent from his trenchant analysis is that the Berlin Wall was 27 miles in length between East and West Berlin and about another 97 miles on the perimeter of the Western Sector.

On the other hand the U.S.-Mexican border is almost 2000 miles.

But we should not automatically dismiss this idea. Just think what a huge public works project this could be! Thousands of jobs and billions upon billions of tax dollars would be needed to bring this to fruition. (This sounds more and more like the New Deal to me—OMG, O’Reilly is an FDR socialist!)

There are some practical problems. Chief among them (for our purposes anyways) is that no self-respecting American would work under the conditions that would be present. This wold be hot dirty dangerous toil at low wages. After all, do you think the Independent Republic of Texas led by the inimitable Rick Perry will have anything resembling a minimum wage or any laws requiring safety measures?

But if this IS a problem, perhaps the potential labor shortage problem could be solved by—ready for this?—recruiting immigrant workers.In fact, by the time the government moves to put this plan into motion…say within two years… the 50,000 or so children clamoring for entry at the border right now will themselves be able to build it as nearly all will be at least six years old by then.

Or, we could simply bring workers from China. What’s 100,000 or so deducted from that labor market when the population far exceeds one billion bodies. And that’s a partial solution for long term unemployment in China where I understand The Kuomintang is trying to gain influence by objecting to the extension of long term unemployment benefits. (That party is still resentful of being exiled to Taiwan.)

But hey! What about also taking care of our Northern boundary with Canada? Through the years we have seen our own people suffer due to Canadian immigrants taking jobs belonging to Americans. I mean, really, William Shatner? The Rock? Norm McDonald? Ted Cruz? Would a wall have even begun to prevent them from entering?

And as we have learned so well the past few years our health care system is so superior to that of Canada that everyone there comes here to see the doctor (well there are at least three examples circulating on the internet—compared to 750,00 Americans who go to foreign nations for their health care each year.)

Or, maybe in lieu of a fence we can just go to Walmart and buy a bunch of these and post them at strategic points.


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  • C J Marshall  On July 18, 2014 at 11:42 AM

    Excellent Dave, simply excellent! I have the feeling though that your effort to educate the cognitively deprived is an exercise in futility. The simpletons who advocate for such strict immigration policy do not use facts or history as their quide; they seem to formulate their ideas in some convoluted stale cerebrial soup that absorbs only what they already believe. And of course FOX keeps feeding their fire with distortion after distortion with intermitant blatant lies. The ignorant may indeed inherit the earth.

    • Little_Minx  On July 18, 2014 at 2:37 PM

      Waving hello to CJ!!! Excellent points.

  • Toadsly  On July 18, 2014 at 3:35 PM

    Using “keep out” posters is a great idea, Dave. People just go under, over, around and through walls.

    • umoc193  On July 20, 2014 at 3:57 AM

      And with walls people could get hurt and end up suing the government, winning huge judgments, requiring cutbacks on giveaways and entitlements…you know…to Exxon and Citibank, etc.

      • Little_Minx  On July 20, 2014 at 2:24 PM

        After all, look what a wall did to Humpty Dumpty 😉

  • Little_Minx  On July 23, 2014 at 8:55 PM

    TOURIST, hope you’re keeping cool! A cold front just blew through the Pgh. area tonight, most welcome after the triple-H weather we were having.

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