THE STEALTH CANDIDATES

For a few months now the media has touted Willard Mitt “The Mittster” Romney as the presumptive Republican nominee for President. Or a synonymous term, putative, could be used. And all you Spanish speakers know what puta means…right?

Last week The Mittster revealed his choice for his running mate, one Paul Ryan.

But based on what is in the public record about those two men, great doubt has been created that these men are whom they say they are.

Let’s look at what is publicly known about Romney first.

Pre-candidacy

  1. Earned a combined MBA and JD at Harvard
  2. Worked at Bain and Company learning how to rape businesses.
  3. Founded Bain Capital to continue that work with a new set of investors.
  4. Left Bain to head up Salt Lake City’s Olympics effort.
  5. After SLC was elected Governor of Massachusetts.
  6. As Governor he was pro-choice.
  7. As Governor he ordered marriage registrars to issue licenses to same sex couples.
  8. As Governor he put together, with heavy Democratic support, a health care insurance plan that included an individual mandate to purchase coverage.
  9. Roundly criticized the budget proposals of Paul Ryan.
  10. Asserts he knows how to fix the economy.
  11. Has run for public office in 1994, 2002, 2008, and 2012

Now let’s look at the fellow claiming to be Mitt Romney who is the pretender to the throne.

Post-Candidacy

  1. Claims his business experience better qualifies him to be President, but refuses to talk about his business experience at Bain.
  2. Is pro-life.
  3. Opposes gay marriage
  4. Speaks out harshly against the Affordable Care Act, especially its individual mandate, even though it is essentially the same as the law passed in Massachusetts.
  5. Claims he knows how to create jobs, yet he himself has been unemployed since leaving the governor’s office.
  6. Seconded a constituent’s suggestion that the Constitutional qualifications for President (and thus V.P., too) be changed with the addition of having three years experience running a business.
  7. Chose the man, Paul Ryan, whose budgets he opposed as his running mate.
  8. Chose Paul Ryan as his running mate who cannot meet that three years in  business qualification he favors.
  9. Despite his running for office four times in the past 18 years, and the past six continuously, he claims he is not a politician.
  10. Refuses to reveal any plans for fixing the economy or creating jobs or changing taxes because to do so would mean he could not get elected.

It is time to examine the contradictions between the two Ryans. In this case they are between his words and his actions.

Words

  1. Has spoken out against sending federal money to local projects or interests.
  2. Has advocated cutting federal spending.
  3.  Has advocated eliminating federal budget deficits.
  4. Has spoken of his admiration for the ideas of Ayn Rand, who basically promotes selfishness and disdains altruism.
  5. Has spoken out against entitlements such as Social Security and tried to privatize SS.

Deeds

  1. Has introduced budgets in the House of Representatives, none of which ends deficits for 25 years or longer.
  2. Opposed the Simpson-Bowles proposals on reducing the deficit because they called for increased taxes.
  3. Even though outlays for defense are the biggest part of discretionary spending, and even though we have exited Iraq, and even though the Cold War is long over, has proposed additional defense spending that far exceeds the spending, based on today’s dollars, we had during the Cold War and Vietnam.
  4. His father’s death when Ryan was 15 entitled him to Social Security Survivor’s benefits which he saved to pay for college.
  5. Despite their effects on adding to deficits he voted for both rounds of the Bush tax cuts, for the unfunded Medicare Part D prescription plan, for TARP, and for the auto bailout.
  6. In 2008 he feverishly tried to get federal aid for the auto and related industries in his hometown of Janesville, Wisc.
  7. Downplays his admiration of Ayn Rand for fear of offending cultural conservatives.

Each of these men look to be quite different in their changed views or their actions from the rhetoric they spouted prior to being on this campaign trail.

Could it be that, like Saddam Hussein, they have body doubles to keep the real humanoid forms safe?

Could it be that the real men have been secretly replaced by robotic replicas?

Could it be that they were bullshitting us?

In the words of Butch and Sundance…

WHO ARE THOSE GUYS?

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